Everyone has that one person on their friend list who just never seems to be around or makes plans then cancels on the day of. This person is inconsistent, all over the place, and always seems to have something going on in their life. You might call them (or people like me) a flake, but the reality is that you are missing the bigger picture. Passion is often mistaken for flakiness, especially in the following eight circumstances:
This is something I often do (and I am sorry, honestly) to those poor men who seek the elusive date. When I get a creative streak and really need to let it out, sitting down to discuss more about myself to a complete stranger is not the remedy. See, dates and passion, especially personal passions, do not necessarily coincide.
Passionate people are independent, strong-willed, and driven. Oftentimes, the companionship, or even the possibility of one, is frightening. What if they do not understand your passion? What if they deter you from it or make fun of it? Sorry, but I choose to fulfill my passions rather than placate your lust.
At work, there is good flaky and bad flaky. These people are often those with a squirrel-like attention span…and chasing the acorns called ideas comes first. Adhering to the deadlines of work projects is often the biggest issue people with productive flakiness have.
Of course, many know how to channel this ADD-like energy into super productivity and multitasking, but others will skip out on group projects to get the tasks closer to individual goals accomplished first. It all depends on their mood, really.
Like the above, job-related meetings are, to the passionate individual, a space in time that can be better used for pursuing solutions to problems or finishing up their latest report. These people remain in their workspace until the last second, and even then, you will hear, “Yeah, I will be there in five minutes.” But then five minutes turns into thirty minutes.
When it comes to friends, family, and significant others, passion can both be a boon and a curse. The passionate friend is the one who suddenly feels the urge to do something, anything, and will often forget they had set plans. Or they will call up those who they made plans with to grab lunch with an excuse like, “I have a dance,” or “So much work just came in.” Again, I apologize for us flaky people. When the urge strikes, we cannot help ourselves.
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5. Phone calls
The same flakiness abides by phone calls. When a passionate person is in the zone, so to speak, a phone call is an ultimate distraction. For those of us who prefer to be uninterrupted while delving into the creative rush, stopping to answer a phone call can be the end of the upwelling of inspiration.
And so even if we promised, even if we say we will call you back or send a message “in a sec,” we will get so sidetracked by our new revelations that a minute for us might be two hours for you. It is nothing against you. We want to hear your voice or discuss the current events, but passion comes in waves. And us uber-passionate people need to catch it when it comes.
As you might have noticed by now, passionate people become flaky people when there are set time guidelines to adhere to. Passion does not understand time. Passion is about going outside of the lines and coloring the world beyond that set moment in time.
I will not tell you just how many times I ran out of the house late because I was too caught up in learning something new or working on dance choreography. If you are friends with someone like me, you know all too well the relief we display when arriving less than five minutes late and the apology of, “I am sorry I am late, I was caught up in X, Y, and Z.”
A lot of people have a set dream. To be a doctor. To create a cure for a specific disease. To build an organization for homeless people. Do not ask us passionate people about our “dream.” Passionate people have more than one dream, and depending on the day, we might be wound up in two or three. Developing multiple passions to see our endless list of dreams come to fruition not only makes us look flaky but indecisive beyond measure.
Over time all this passion leads to a flakiness habit. Passion is intoxicating, and so if people like myself, even get a smidgen of satisfaction from it, we always seek to better ourselves and our passions. We do not really realize that we are being flakes most of the time. We are just doing what works for us.
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Passion often leads people away from setting plans and friendships, but this should not be seen as a negative personality trait. Flakiness and inconsistency are merely the side effects of dealing with a person who is always striving for something more. So support these people in your life. They will thank you for the understanding and will, in time, return the favor a thousandfold.