How to Compose a Message for Online Dating Purposes


In today’s times, technology has become a much more widely accepted method of meeting a mate. Despite greater acceptance, it is still important for you to know the etiquette required when contacting someone through an online dating website. First and foremost, you must remember your manners. Second, be sure to use proper grammar and spelling throughout your message. Finally, be unique.

When contacting someone online, you may feel a sense of empowerment because you are not face to face. Being behind a computer oftentimes gives individuals courage to approach someone that they would not have, had they met face to face. This anonymity can be both a benefit and a hindrance. When contacting someone through an online dating site, it is important for you to remember your manners. Be sure not to say anything in the message that you would not say to a person in public. If you would not approach a woman by shouting to her, “Yo, what’s up sexy mama,” then you should never put that in a message. Remember, whatever you write in your online message is going to create a first impression, one that can never be changed.

Since your message is going to be creating a first impression for you, you want to be sure to use proper grammar and spelling. Many people may feel that it is okay to use internet lingo when messaging someone through an online dating site, but it has proven time and time again to be unacceptable. If someone were to send you a message that was barely readable due to the many grammatical and spelling errors, you would assume that their literacy level was fairly low, thus creating a negative impression of the individual. This is what you must think of each time you begin to write a message to someone. There are thousands of software programs which allow you to spell check and even grammar check your writing before sending it. This helps to ensure that you don’t make embarrassing errors that could lead to a costly misunderstanding.

The final, and most important tip to remember when writing a message to someone on an online dating site, is to be unique. There are thousands of people registered on hundreds of different dating sites. When you write someone a message, you have to be sure to write something that makes you stand apart from the other 999 individuals trying to find love. It can be difficult to communicate through messages online, but a single message could be your one window of opportunity. Do not send someone a message with a single sentence such as, “Hey, how was your day.” Instead, try creating several points of conversation throughout your message.

For example, you might say, “Hey Lisa, my name is Thomas and I noticed you liked to ice skate. I always go to the rink down on the corner of 5th and Broadway; they have some of the best cotton candy. Where is your favorite place to ice skate? Maybe if we get to know each other a little better, we could meet there one day and enjoy some food and drinks.” This simple message finds common ground between you and the individual you are interested, while also offering up a possible future meeting. Of course, your message doesn’t have to read as professional and straight forward as this one, but you want it to be along the same lines.

Overall, sending a message to someone via an online dating site can be easily mastered if you follow a few simple steps. First and foremost, remember your manners. When writing a message try to keep in mind the rule that states do unto others as you would have them do unto you. While writing, you should also take time to proofread what you’ve written, even if it is only a few sentences. Finally, be unique in your messaging. Someone may receive dozens of messages a day, and it will take a special message to catch their attention.