7 Things You Shouldn’t Say to Those Who Are Depressed


Nowadays, so many people suffer from depression that we can say it is one of the most widespread disorders. If you know such people among your friends, relatives or colleagues you should be careful about what you say to them. Certain words can easily hurt depressed people. They are incredibly vulnerable at such periods. Sometimes your wrong words can make them feel even worse but not help to recover.

Think thoroughly before you advise anything to your suffering friend. Surely, your intentions are only the best, but still, something can be harmful to your friend’s feelings. That’s why consider the following things which you shouldn’t say to those who have depression.

1. “Everything is in your head!”

It’s not a secret that depression usually starts in our minds. Only our bad thoughts cause negative emotions, feelings of frustration, and as a result, we get depressed. But you shouldn’t remember this fact to your friend so many times. In such a way, you won’t help a person overcome their problem, to emphasize it. Your friend will become nervous and upset.

All your efforts will certainly fail. The only recommendation in such situations is to see the problem through the person’s eyes and express your support. That is the most efficient way to help those who are depressed.

2. “Do not pity yourself!”

To my mind, today, everyone can face the problem of depression. People of different professions, nationalities, and ages are subjected to this disorder. When you communicate with such people, show your understanding and sympathy to them. Don’t criticize them. If you think that your friend will not be frustrated after your words, you are greatly mistaken. Depression isn’t such an easy thing to get rid of.

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3. “There are so many reasons for you to be happy!”

Never say these words to those who have depression. It will have only a negative effect. Surely, this statement is true, but only for you, not for those who feel blue. They can’t accept the beauty of the life around them. They see only bad sides in everything. It’s useless to persuade depressed people in all the positive aspects of their life. At such moments they are blind and unable to understand you. You will irritate your friend by saying this.

4. “I considered you to be much stronger”

No doubt such words can disappoint and upset every person, even that one who is not depressed. But if you say this sentence to your friend who has an affective disorder, you will certainly harm them. And all your attempts to improve your friend’s mood will dwindle to nothing.

The person who suffers from depression won’t feel your support anyway. Finally, their grief and bad feelings will increase, and you also can be disappointed as you failed to help the friend.

5. “Some people have even more problems than you do”

If you tell such a phrase to a depressed person, you can certainly spoil everything. Consequently, your friend will get nervous and angry at you. Every day we have so many problems, which constantly appear on our way. Some of them are real trifles, and our life is impossible without them. We learn to cope with those problems throughout our life.

But people who are in depression accept all the trifles like a real tragedy. Try to avoid saying these words to people who are suffering. They will blame themselves for not being able to get rid of the problems.

6. “I don’t even know who you are anymore”

Remember that you should not say this to people who are upset and have a bad mood. By saying these words, you will not discover something new for a depressed person; you will only point to their miserable state of mind. At this period, people feel forlorn and hopeless. They can’t see any ray of hope for changes and improvement. Your sentence will definitely increase the person’s pains. It’s better to keep your thoughts to yourself.

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7. “Don’t forget that life is unfair”

I’m sure that everyone has faced the unfairness of life at least one time. It’s not a secret for you that really there can be some unfair situations in our life. But such is this world. And those who are depressed also know about this state of things. They know and still continue to be frustrated and sad. Many causes can lead to depression.

They are of physiological nature. You can be sure that even if you tell this phrase to the person with such a disorder million times, you won’t help the one to escape from depression. I must say that it is extremely difficult to surmount this physiological disorder though it is possible. Support your close people at every opportunity, help them solve their problems, and never leave them alone.

So you can see that some of our words are really harmful to those who are depressed. Perhaps you have an experience of telling such phrases to your friends or relatives who felt upset. What were the consequences? If you know some other statements that can hurt people with an affective disorder, please tell us.