Women and Their Pursuit of Perfection


Most women have issues when it comes to their bodies. Unfortunately, it tends to stem from childhood. A relative or friend might have made an unflattering comment about weight gain or that she wasn’t as “pretty as someone else.” To a growing child, the remark made an imprint that can never truly be erased. It’s like a broken record playing in her head. She wasn’t perfect and now that she’s grown she continually tries to correct the perceived problem.

Self-confidence and self-worth

If these women are fortunate, they had parents who tried to help instill self-confidence and self-worth into them. Being taught you’re valued for more than just your outward appearance is so important in the formative years. The idea is to avoid setting the person up for dangerous habits to possibly emerge. If they love themselves, then this is less likely to happen.


Once they reach adolescence, even well-adjusted young women can be affected. The fact that society worships beauty, thinness, and unrealistic body images puts additional pressure on females who just want to fit in. It doesn’t help to be told that you’re not meant to be a size 2, or look like a movie star, when you’re fifteen years old and your self-esteem is in the toilet.


The unfairness of it all can lead some girls to punish themselves. They turn to overeating to comfort themselves when nothing else works. Many gain weight, which makes the situation worse. In an attempt to rectify their predicament, some will turn to unhealthy weight-loss measures. Starving themselves or binging and purging become a way of life. Friends might suggest they pop a few diet pills to kill their appetites. Still others turn to excessive exercise in the quest for perfection or they start smoking to avoid eating.

The toll it takes on their young bodies and minds can be devastating; habits that can be virtually impossible to break form and haunt them throughout their lives. Without the proper guidance, many will remain unhappy, lonely, and trapped by their circumstances. Once a pattern of self-hatred is established, the real issues are obscured. Most just don’t know how to get to the root of their problems.

Why does it have to be like this? Why do women continually make themselves suffer? There’s no clear-cut answer that will apply to every women and every circumstance. It’s hard for some women to break old habits, when they are so used to being at war with their bodies. To truly relax into your own skin, means acknowledging pain, not suppressing it by other means. All women want to be loved for who they are, but to be loved by others, means you have to love yourself first.