Are you in love? Really, truly in love?
Many of you will answer that question with a resounding yes, but here is the next question…
What is your love life like?
Is it perfect and wonderful?
If you said yes to that last question, then you are either lying or you are missing out on some amazing passion in your love life. After all, everyone should have a love life filled with passion.
That passion can ebb and flow at times, but it will always burst into intense flames at just the right moment. That intensity should never scare you, because that is when you will feel vulnerable, yet loved down to your core.
But how about messy love? Is it worth the candle? Read on.
1. Imperfection is acceptable
You are not perfect, and neither is your partner. And you know what? That is acceptable. However, you probably have difficulty accepting the fact that you are not perfect and the fact that your partner is not either. We all want our partners to change a little bit here and there, but we must remember that we loved them with all their imperfections first.
We should all listen to our partners though, and consider what they are asking of us. They do know us better than we know ourselves at times, and they are only trying to help us a little.
If your partner is asking you to change, you may want to try to be accommodating, but understand that they will understand if you are unable to.
At least both of your imperfections will make for some amazing conversations or exasperating moments.
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2. Find a balance for me time and together time
If you are the type of person that loves your partner, but needs some alone time on occasion, you will need to come to a compromise together. Your partner may not see why you need time away from them or, if you are lucky, they will feel the same way.
Of course, you will never want alone time at the same time, which is where the compromising comes into play. Your business partner could have a large business gathering that they want you to attend, but you would rather go for a stroll through a local park or art gallery. This scenario or any similar one can cause a rift in any relationship, making any outcome messy.
These scenarios will creep up in any relationship, and they should not be ignored. Instead, you can both try to find a way to get what you want.
3. Avoid the fairy tale perception
You may have dreamed of a fairy tale relationship the entire time you were growing up, but that just is not going to happen. No one has ever successfully carried out a fairy tale romance. At least, not that we know of.
You are going to argue with your partner and sometimes those arguments are not going to make sense to you. While some of those arguments will be huge, others will be small and petty and insignificant. There will be no rhyme or reason as to why you are fighting about who replaced the toilet paper last or whose turn it is to wash the curtains.
Since you already know that your relationship is not going to be all rosy, you will be able to embrace the fact that you and your significant other will learn how to communicate. Yes, communicate! This is what makes your messy love keep thriving.
Communication is when you both sit down and talk to each other, or stand there and hurl offensive words at each other. The good news is that eventually, you will both simmer down, things will work out, and you will have fabulous night. Okay, so maybe part of every relationship is a somewhat fairy tale like…
The takeaway on messy, imperfect relationships is that you have grown into the person that you are. You worked hard to get where you are in life, and while you want true love, you do not want to sacrifice yourself or who you are.
That means you are going to be opinionated, loud, and bossy on occasion. It also means that your significant other could be the same way. Guess, why your love is so passionate?
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Relationships are comprised of people with either similar personalities or they are the polar opposite of each other. You will need to learn how to communicate with your partner, while also being understanding even in your messy, imperfect relationship.
The result of your messy, imperfect relationship will be a passion that you will feel throughout your entire body. One minute you will be enraged, and the next, you will wonder how you could ever live without the love of your life.
These relationships might not seem possible, but in reality, they are not only doable, but the best ones in the entire world.1